Your relationship happiness is in danger.
Have you ever wondered if you do things that your partner off, without even realizing it?
Despite your best intentions, are you daring your boyfriend to break up with you by doing these things?
While every couple’s dynamic is different, there are some common bad habits women develop in relationships that, when left unchecked, could unintentionally lead to a breakup.
Knowing what self-sabotaging behaviors to avoid can help you keep your relationship healthy and sustain lasting love.
If you don’t want common bad habits to be reason you breakup, here are 6 things you should stop doing in your relationship ASAP.
1. You don’t appreciate him
Ever had someone not seem to care or notice all of the little things you did for them? It’s a super common complaint and feels miserable.
Lack of appreciation is a relationship killer, more than anything else on this list. Why? Because after a while, the unappreciated partner feels like they don’t matter to the other person.
Love turns into resentment and the relationship begins to crash and burn. Ever heard that quote, “The opposite of love is not hate. It’s indifference,” by Eli Wisel? When you don’t notice the little sacrifices and things the other person does for you on a daily basis, it sows deep seeds of resentment.
2. You’re unappeasable
Men report that they are more often to end relationships over not being able to make their partner happy.
Happiness is an aphrodisiac for men. If you’ve heard a man say to you, “No matter what I do, you aren’t happy?”, that’s a cause for alarm. This one is so insidious because often, your partner may inadvertently internalize your general complaints and criticisms as his faults, especially if he can’t solve them.
It also is not a dramatic change that anyone can point to and say, “Well, one day, she just wasn’t happy ever again.” Unhappiness erodes men’s confidence in their ability to please their partners over time.
This is why it becomes doubly important to cultivate an atmosphere of happiness and lightness in your relationship. If you aren’t happy, he isn’t happy.
Keep that in mind when you’re sharing your disappointment and discontent — regardless of whether it was his fault or not.
3. You are bossy
There are times in a relationship when one partner is guilty of being bossy and ordering their partner around. What you need is healthy communication about your wants and needs. Sometimes, how you deliver the message is the main issue. Other times, it’s the negative energy behind the message.
If you are used to being in control and super efficient at work, perhaps it’s time to give yourself a little time to transition when you get home.
Just grabbing a few minutes to yourself in between activities to allow for a graceful transition can help you go from being a boss to being a loving partner.
4. You let yourself go
It’s so common to get into a relationship and gain a few pounds or start wearing sweats all the time and think it isn’t too big of a deal.
Often, couples spiral downward together, only to wake up one day and realize that they are both are 20 pounds heavier and need serious improvements to their hygiene and wardrobe.
5. You nag
Nagging obviously isn’t fun for the nagger or the nagged. It sets up an uncomfortable situation where one person feels like they have suddenly regressed back to childhood with their Mom nagging them to pick up their socks. The nagger, on the other hand, feels like the nagged just isn’t pulling their weight in the relationship — not a sexy dynamic.
Not only should you make an effort to stop nagging if you are prone to it, but if you are the one being nagged, it’s time to start looking at how you can help out, remember details and generally make your partner feel more taken care of.
Having been on both sides myself, this nagging dynamic can become a habit between a couple.
6. You discount mutual friend time
A great relationship requires hobbies, outside interests, and strong friendships. If you are struggling to keep the spark alive, understand that both of you might just need time apart — the good kind.
Maintaining your friendships and allowing your partner time to maintain theirs helps provide the air that any relationship needs to thrive.